Pink skies and leadership

Wow, this week was crazy. It seems like I say that every week, but this week topped it off. It was our biggest week so far in the summer with a total of 140 (ish) campers, so there were a lot of mouths to feed including the staff and volunteers. The food part of the week went well, it was the whole leadership part that went nuts. I can't get into all the details, but basically God used this week to stretch me farther than ever before. It was uncomfortable. It was painful. It stunk big time! But you know what...I'm glad it happened. I'm glad I had to do things that were miles outside of my comfort zone, and I know God used it to help me grow in huge ways. I read in my devotions today about the testimony of General "Stonewall" Jackson, and his quote caught my eye: "I feel as safe in battle as I am in my bed, because God has an appointed time for me to die." How awesome! Why should I be afraid of anything life throws my way? God has a plan for all of it and He will keep me safe. He will use all the hardships and tribulations I endure for my good and for His glory.

Also in my devotions I read the account of creation...slowly, thoughtfully, allowing it to soak in. As I finished this amazing story, sitting on the back deck of the lodge looking at the beautiful colored sky God made...I couldn't help but wish I had been there to see it happen. What an amazing sight that would have been, to see the creation of this beauty we call nature. I wonder if we get to see a "video" of it when we get to heaven. That would be sweet. Who could ever doubt the existence of a God after taking a glance at the beauty around us?

Well, we're off to week number six of camp. Please continue praying about financial needs for school and my car, as those are the most pressing needs I see at the moment. Pray for us as a camp staff this week since the numbers are way down once again, that we would keep up the enthusiasm for the few campers we have this week.

Free falling

Wow, this week was insanity. And this upcoming week is going to be even more insane...if that's possible. I'm praying hardcore that God will help me make it through, because even when I got home yesterday I felt like a zombie. My physical strength is definitely failing me right now, I'm pretty much running completely on "God fumes".

This summer has been a huge learning experience so far. I have made a few serious changes in my walk with God, including developing a stronger love for Him and His Word, and I am learning how important prayer is. As I face my last year of college, I have HUGE financial needs that must be met. My car is falling apart pretty much...and I don't know if I'll have the money to fix it before I go back next month. I just wrote a check for my first payment for this semester, and that smarts. Right now my monthly payments when I get back to school are over $1,000 a month. Yikes! That's a little difficult to comprehend when I only make maybe $600 a month at my deli job. I have been on my knees pleading to my Savior, trusting that He will provide what I need for this school year. It's a tough spot to be in, but strangely it is also peaceful. I know that there is nothing that I, personally, can do for myself. But I have an AWESOME God who has promised to take care of me and my genuine needs. What an amazing truth.

Anyway, back to something besides that annoying green stuff. My heart has been twisting and turning many painful ways this summer as well. I feel like there are so many things from my past and present that are tugging it in so many directions. A real struggle I have right now is being content where I am: single, poor college student, unsure where I'll be a year from now. It's so hard! I've been fighting this contentment battle for a long time, and it's wearing me so thin. Please pray for me...I need it now more than ever.

Despite the hardships I have faced emotionally this summer, I have many blessings as well. I love the friends I've made at camp, and being able to see God working directly in people's lives is extremely rewarding. I've developed more in the music area of my life, and that brings me a lot of joy when I just feel like collapsing in frustration. God has brought testing into my life, but He also brings joy in the little things. I am beginning to realize just how much this amazing God of the universe loves me, His precious child.

Well, that's all for now. I've probably babbled enough...nobody will read this anyway.

Happy 4th of July!

Well, the most difficult week of camp (family camp) is finished. Hallelujah. Family camp is so...unique...I'm glad we only have one week of it per summer. It was a blast hanging out with the families - getting to know new ones, reminiscing with returning families - but it will be nice to get back to the normal camper routine next week.

I've discovered a new show that has piqued my interest: Mental. I guess it's kind of like the show House except it's about mental disorders, not physical abnormalities. Being a counseling major, this is kinda my thing. So far the acting has been a little crummy...but I like how I can actually recognize the terms and diagnoses they throw out as they go from case to case. Along with that, I decided I want to read up a little on autism while I don't have any assigned reading for school during the summer. I really want to work with people with autism or Asperger's eventually, so I want to study up on it as much as I can during my free reading time.

I really hope next week is warmer than this week was! Those poor wilderness campers...